Saturday, February 18, 2012

Perhapser

I ran across the word 'perhapser' while reading Albert Nobbs, the novella by Irish author George Moore. I had seen the movie and was interested in how true it was to the original work, and I found a word to get stuck on.

Perhapser. It was used in the context of .... 'he is a perhapser.' He is a maybe-er ... ah, not quiet the cut that perhapser makes.

I'm taken with this word, this expression, because I've come up against too many of that kind. The perhapser has no intention of following through with whatever it is that is the question before them. It's a word usually spoken quietly. It is not a consideration. It is a pause and a genial way of saying no. One wouldn't want to offend he who is asking.

I don't understand it. Say yes. Say no. But say yes to me of course! Don't give me that wiggly dance of I know you want this, and I don't, so I'll, in my mind, satisfy with a perhaps. Goodness, there's no satisfaction in that. It's passion-less. It's frustrating. And it keeps me on a line when what I really need to do is say, NO! I don't accept that!

Perhaps, I should consider the other side. Perhaps, I should, for once, be beguiling and allow the other to think that I'm willing to be genial, but not cooperative. It is such a tease. And that I am not. I can not bear this perhapser. It is too cruel.

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